Wedding

Now that we’re very near finishing our thank you cards, it is finally time to write a post about our wedding. On September 8, 2012, our friends and family helped us celebrate our marriage. Having a wedding was really meaningful for us because our families are from opposite coasts, and are unlikely to have another opportunity to come together.

Since graduating high school we’ve often heard that whole communities only make time to meet for weddings and funerals. Since we had the time, motivation and resources we decided the former was a gift we wanted to give to ourselves and our loved ones. Here are some of the beautiful stories that came out of this adventure.

The Travelers-

Several people made an extraordinary effort to celebrate with us. Friends came in from California, Colorado, Tennessee, Missouri, New York, and Afghanistan. We expect (rightly or wrongly) our families to drop everything for our wedding, but to see how our friends planned their precious leave of duty, arranged long weekends, and purchased tickets on a shoe string budget was truly humbling.

We are also grateful for our family members who did indeed drop everything to attend. Several family members arranged tight work schedules. Most notably, my brother who got a special leave of absence even though his ship was out to sea. One of my sisters had a brand new baby. The other sister had a baby on the way, and was in great pain. But she woke up early and drove three hours so her fiancée could recover a bit from his swing shift. Mike’s sister came in from Singapore. The rest of his immediate family came from the New York area. One of my dad’s came from Florida. One of my Aunts came from Virginia.

The Helpers

Thanks to Dad, Marla, Nanny, and Mike’s folks for offering gifts large enough to cover much of the budget. Thanks to all the guests whose contributions covered the rest.

Thanks to Marla for managing many boxes and orders for the wedding.

Thanks to Uncle Dale for managing the venue and food. Thanks to all the guests for good eats

Thanks to Aunt Pam, Aunt Diane, and Aunt Lisa for being generally helpful.


Thanks to my mom for making exactly the cake we wanted.

Thanks to grandma for the use of great great grandma’s cake stand. For the toast flutes, unity candle, and the perfect cake topper.

Thanks to Mike’s parents for renting a house big enough for their family, and many of our friends. We had our photos there too. But thanks especially for letting the party continue until it fizzled out at 3am. Later Mike’s dad made a great airport taxi.

Thanks to Rod for video recording.

Thanks to Barbara for growing/arranging the bridal bouquets and sharing special champagne.

Thanks to Crystal for helping with the bouquets, and being an excellent host of other guests.

Thanks to Gina, Steve, and their connections who got us cheap kegs.

Thanks to Aunt Patti for bridesmaids bouquets, and decorations.

Thanks to countless folks who shared their photos.

Thanks to Aunt Lorie for a stellar photo booth, and guest book.

Thanks to Kelly, who baked for the cake walk.

Thanks to all the friends who set up chairs and tables at the venue.

Thanks to all those who stayed to the bitter end cleaning up.

Thank you to DaKishia who officiated our sermon with such thoughtfulness, love, and care.

Memorable Moments-

It took a veritable team to make this wedding happen. Sometimes it’s hard to ask, and I don’t want to bother people. Yet people were again, and again, overwhelmingly generous. This wedding showed us how much love and support that we have with us. When it all came together, it was perfect, quirks and all. There were some truly memorable moments.

Like playing games, and cake walk.

Or the gorgeous weather.   

Story telling, and toasts. 

My younger cousins standing around singing to each other.

 

Sneak, petal attacks. 

After party!

But the most joyous thing, was all the feedback later about people connecting, and having a good time. We are truly blessed.

Hello Again!!!

These last couple of months have been wonderFULL. I came home on August 12^th, and Mike followed a few weeks later after taking a side trip to visit his sister in Singapore. We both left Jeju in a bit of a whirlwind, on a mission to visit family and get married. (more on that in the next post!)

I was on a little high when I came home. So many things were fascinating. New products came out, people spoke English all over the place, but the most surprising, was the things that I forgot I missed. (like beets!) I realized when I rediscovered things that I forgot I missed, how happy I usually am, wherever I am. Much of the time I can get caught up in the blessings, and stay there.

I do still miss things of course, and Jeju made a big impression. Besides my friends, students, and a beautiful Island, I also miss food, bowing, and the polite way to position hands when giving or receiving things. Those things will stay with me forever.

Still I'm never without. Home brought celebrations, connections, and opportunities. We've been staying with Mike's family in New York for most of the last four months. It's been amazing to bond with them, and I feel at home with my new family. (Another teaser for a future post!)

I'll always be a Washington girl though. When I'm in the grocery store, and can't easily find the Asian or Vegetarian ingredients I love, then I miss my hippie state. Most of all I miss my home and family during big moments, like my littlest sister welcoming her first baby to the world.

 Things are always moving though, and so shall we. These holidays will  bring a closing, and and opening. We'll be off in the New Year, full of hope for the latest adventures in Utah.

Parking

People park in a lot of interesting ways on Jeju. I’ve seen folks parked on side walks, in the street, and jutting out in weird directions. Creative parking is encouraged here. Since space is such a premium and parking garages are super small, people just double park

.

 The white car below is blocking at least two cars and two motorcycles. The third care may be blocked too, especially for an inexperienced driver.

 To solve this parking dilemma people post their cell phone number in their window, and move the car when they get a call

.

No Lights

This short video shows an example of a rotary without lights. These big, open intersections are everywhere in Jeju, especially in small towns. I don’t think this kind of traffic free flow would ever work in the United States.

Traffic Lights

As stated at the start of this mini-series on traffic, red lights are a suggestion. The further you are from a city the less seriously traffic lights are taken. I work in the country, and I cross a four lane highway daily. It is unusual to see cars stop, and the biggest stoppers are always using rental cars. If the driver sees a pedestrian waiting at a designated cross then they may stop for a red light, but there is no guarantee.

In the video attached you see the rotary below our house, and how drivers pay lip service to the red light.

Thanks for reading

Seatbelts

One of my co-teachers studied in the United States for a few months, so I asked her what she thought the strangest thing was. She quickly said she didn’t understand why people in the back seat wear  seatbelts. Since I asked her opinion I decided not to go on a diatribe about how seatbelts save lives.

Seatbelts are neither a legal matter nor popular in Korea. Babies sit on laps or crawl around the car as they please. Once I saw a car seat in the front; it was facing forward and the baby wasn’t strapped in. I’ve been in many cars where I fished the seatbelt out of the seat. Often in taxi’s they block the use of seatbelts by sealing the buckle with tape or tying back the belt. It’s one thing to choose not to wear a seatbelt, but to inhibit the use is mind boggling. Seatbelt use has been so ingrained in me that I feel really insecure when I’m not wearing one. 

There are arguments, particularly from those raised prior to “click it or ticket”, that seat belts should be a personal choice and that the government is infringing on individual rights to self determine how important safety is. It's a reasonable concern whenever government is suspected of going too far, but it also seems that it would have taken a long time to convince most people to wear seatbelts without a legal incentive. As a fully indoctrinated seatbelt wearer, I just can’t muster up the energy to protest this overstep of government authority. Perhaps this complacency paves the way for further government infringement on individual affairs, but what can I say? I like seatbelts, so I comfort myself with the belief that seatbelts are a public health issue and that auto accident fatalities are expensive.

I also found a few interesting statistics. According to the US Department of Transportation on p 142 of a report, the United States had 33,808 auto fatalities in 2009. Whereas the Education Institute of Transportation in Korea listed 342,233 fatalities in 2005 on p 2 of a report. Considering that Korea has a much smaller population, these numbers show a lot. There are many ways that I could illustrate with numbers, such as crashes per 100,000 people, percent of crashes with fatalities, percentage of fatalities wearing seatbelts, etc but I’m only a casual blogger. In short, wear your seatbelt! 

Taxis

Second in the roadway hierarchy are taxis. Taxis are more aggressive and agile than a bus, but they rank second due to size. When I first came to Korea, I tried to avoid riding in taxis as often as possible. Initially when forced to catch a cab I would spend the entire ride clutching the seat while intently watching the traffic.

Eventually I became desensitized to the perils of riding in a taxi. I reasoned that taxis were a prime opportunity to accept situations beyond my control. Once I made a decision to get in a taxi, almost nothing else was in my control. I couldn’t control poor driving by the cabbie or the fellow motorists so I would actively try to remain calm even while the occasional driver watched TV in his car instead of looking at the road. 

Taxis are abundant and affordable on Jeju. If you’re going somewhere within 15 minutes with one or two friends it is often cheaper and definitely more convenient to share a cab than to take a bus. A 50 minute taxi ride over the mountain and across the island is the equivalent of $30. This makes for a reasonable night out when you’re sharing the cab and the bill with your favorite dancing buddies.