Helping

In early October the second grade teacher at Tosan went on medical leave, and my co-teacher was asked to take over the second grade class. The principal asked a meek and nervous woman from the school library to teach English. This poor lady hadn’t taught before, and she was given very little feedback from the previous English teacher about what to do with the kids or where they were at in the curriculum. She showed up to the first class without a plan despite having a few days notice.

On the first day I gave her some pointers about where the kids were at, and what the previous teacher did with them, but I didn’t jump in to help teach. I felt a mean inside because it was clear that this woman was struggling. I could have eased her burden, but I also knew she would become reliant on me. Her reliance would have doubled my work load for the rest of the semester and possibly the rest of my contract. In early October I was still going into school 2 hours early to keep up with the work load I was then carrying. So even though it felt bad watching the substitute’s exasperation I stood by my boundaries and chose not to help teach on her first day.

The next time I saw her teach she had improved tremendously, and by the end of a few weeks she hit her stride. All my guilty feelings about not helping on the first day were completely dissolved by the end of the second day. Teaching is a great learning opportunity, and if I had intervened on the first day, I could have potentially limited a valuable experience for my colleague. I want to continue developing my understanding of when it is appropriate to help, and when “helping” is just interference that doesn’t serve me or others.